I'll probably piss a few people off, here... but what the hell. What has happened to our society? We seem to be raising a population of wimps! This "feel good", "everybody wins" crap has just gone too far. I mean, boosting self esteem in kids is great, but at what cost? Can anyone really feel good about themselves, when they are rewarded for nothing?
When I was a kid, we competed for a spot on the team. 200 kids tried out, the best 25 made the team. Play a game? The team with the highest score wins. Play Monopoly? Somebody wins.. Spelling bee? Someone wins. We had band competitions, drill teams, chess clubs, you name it. We didn't just show up. We wanted to win!
I guess I'd been in the dark for a while. I don't know when everything changed. Now that I have kids, I see it. when my oldest was 6, she started playing soccer. Her team sucked! That year, and the 2 years following, they'd have a big party at the end of the season. And there it was. From the best players to the crappiest, everyone was the same. Everyone got a trophy. Seriously. The kids that really tried and made real effort received no further recognition than the kids who showed up once in a while, and put little to no effort into the sport. Yay for everyone!
Bullshit.
I'm not saying, that at a very young age, we should tell our kids that winning is the only option. But certainly, there's nothing wrong with them setting goals. If we reward kids for just "showing up", what motivation is there to do any better? So, let's have the cheerleaders yell "Rah, rah, ree, mediocrity! Rah rah rass, I'm a lazy ass". And now a days, that cheer leader can be some uncoordinated toad, because now, everyone that wants to be a cheerleader, is. When I was in high school, those girls competed to make that squad! Only the best made it. Jebus, at 53 years old, I'm pretty sure I could jump higher than half the girls on the local squad.
So, now I get started on sports teams. What the hell is going on? Seriously... EVERYONE makes the team?! I know, people will argue "at least they're out there trying". I get that. But what the hell? This obsession with making everyone "feel good" is not preparing them for life. If you don't even have to try, what's the point? If I wanted to make the team, I knew I had to practice. There were some damn good athletes in my town. If I wanted a spot on the team, I'd better work my ass off, and give it my all! And when our team played a game, we knew they kept score! Why? Some body's gonna win, and somebody's gonna loose. Call me crazy, but loosing was never an option! People will argue "Winning isn't everything, so long as they're having fun". well, I'm here to tell you, winning is a hell of a lot more fun than loosing! Being a winner is as much a mind set as it is skill and hard work.A while back, a coach I used to work with told me "I never go into a game expecting to win". I just about crapped my pants. It's no wonder she's a lousy coach, and the team consistently looses.
I grew up in a time, and thankfully in a town, where winning was the goal. Colton High kicked ass in just about every sport, guys and gals. We worked hard be CA state champions! Our Marching band kicked ass, our drill team, our Drama kids... hell, our school newspaper was #1 in the nation. No kid in that school ever set out to be mediocre. That was just not acceptable.
This isn't about sports, people... it's about life. Life is a competition! How many kids get out of college, and can't get a job? It amazes me that so many think they simply have to apply, or worse, the perfect job will somehow find them. They have no idea how to compete in the job market. Hello... you have to convince these employers that you are the best! You have to stand up and fight! When you make everything easy for kids, how will they ever learn to try? If you want to succeed in life, you have to win! You must rise to every challenge, and fight for every inch of ground! How many parents have adult children living with them, and somehow think this is okay? A temporary set back? maybe, but it should never be a choice. Making it okay for kids to be mediocre is no less a disservice than buying booze for an alcoholic. Expect more from them, and maybe they'll surprise you and start trying.
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